You have probably heard it said that we always have a choice in whatever we face in life. Last year, a colleague and friend, remarked that sometimes, we have to take the best, worst choice. His comment caused me to think about the times in my life when I made the best, worst choice. I decided to share one of my experiences with you.

My Best, Worst Choice

About 34 years ago, in a previous marriage, I was faced with just such bad options. The marriage was over. We tried counseling, but it was too little, too late. My husband at the time, wanted me to immediately move myself and my 13-year-old son out of his house. Believe me, I didn’t want to stay there, but my options were few. Whatever choice I made, it meant disrupting our lives and causing my son to have to change schools. I owned my own home, but it was rented out and the lease would not be up for another year.

 I would need to rent a place for my son and I to live.  but I did not have the financial means to get an apartment.  As I saw it at that time, my options were to stay where I was and endure a very uncomfortable lifestyle, get a hotel room, or move in with my sister, her husband and their three children. Their house was small with only 3 bedrooms and one full bathroom, so it was already very crowded.

My long-range plan was to move back to my house once the tenants’ lease was up. That plan would allow me to put my son back in the school system that he was most familiar with, but that wasn’t going to happen for at least a year.

Pain, Guilt and Shame, Oh My!

I was leaning toward moving in with my sister, but if I moved my son there, he would have to change schools more than once. Fortunately, my son’s father lived in the area of the school that my son used to attend. My feelings of guilt and shame were almost unbearable.  I was not on good terms with my son’s dad, and as difficult as it was to let go of my son, I felt it was best for him to move in with his dad until I could put my life back together. I agonized over my options and although this option was still a terrible one in my eyes, it would be the least disruptive to my son’s education and well-being. I chose to put aside my pride, guilt, shame and heartache and do what was best for my boy.

I lived with my sister for a short while and saw my son as often as possible. Eventually, I was able to move back into my house and in time, my son lived with me again.

Sometimes, we are in a position where a choice needs to be made. Our options are not always ideal. In those instances, we must make the best, worst choice. Later, when better options are available to us, we can choose something else.

When have you been faced with having to choose between options that ranged from bad to worse? What did you do?

Share your comments here, or send an email to me at linda@lindathurwanger.com

Convert Challenges into Possibilities